Drabble Post - Declaration
Sep. 15th, 2010 12:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kristenskWell, I might have finally finished Falman's entry for my "Ground Rules" series. Maybe. I'm not at all sure if I like this yet. For one thing, it's less of a "how Ed and Falman met" and more "Ed uses Falman as his personal encyclopedia". Ah well....
Declaration
The office was quiet save for a soft murmur of voices trickling past the half-open door to his private chamber. Bored, Colonel Mustang tuned an ear to the muffled conversation and was able to pick out, first, Warrant Officer Vato Falman—
“In October of 1661, the citizens of Cameron staged an armed protest when the military refused to pay the local men hired to work on the construction of the new bridge. This was despite their earlier promises of good pay.”
—and then, the office’s new regular, Edward Elric.
“So, they weren’t happy with doing all the work and not having anything to show for it.”
“Correct,” said Falman.
History lessons, Mustang mused. He wondered if Fullmetal was simply bored with the report he should be writing or considering some lead in Cameron. Either way, he was probably quickly learning that asking a question of Falman was guaranteed to get you more of an answer than you bargained for. The normally laconic warrant officer had a memory like an encyclopedia and a tendency to recite the full “entry” on any given topic when prompted. It was a useful talent but one that could quickly wear at the nerves.
“Hey, has anyone ever revolted just because they thought the Fuhrer was a jerk?”
Fullmetal was definitely bored. Well, that report had better be completed by day’s end or it would be some time before he found anymore opportunities for boredom.
“Yes, in fact,” Falman was saying. “In 1594...”
Mustang tuned the remainder of the conversation out.
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“What,” Mustang felt taut muscles cause an involuntary tick over his right eye, “is this?”
In his hands was Fullmetal’s report. If it could be called that.
“Whereas my commanding officer has chosen to shirk his duties and instead assign a subordinate to handle all affairs he deems tasteless or in some way beneath his standing and whereas said subordinate is a duly recognized State Alchemist pursuing an important line of research, I, as the aforementioned State Alchemist, do hereby declare my refusal to perform further menial tasks unless provided just compensation.”
And, that was just the opening paragraph. The “report” continued with a detailed list of grievances, references to military law, comparisons to historical conflicts and obvious abuse of a thesaurus. The actual report on Fullmetal’s most recent mission was a small footnote.
“Oh, for—!” Mustang slammed the report down on the desk. “I asked him to pick up my uniform from the laundry once!”
“The uniform and a sandwich, Sir,” Hawkeye corrected.
“One uniform, one sandwich, one time,” said Mustang. “And, he wasn’t doing anything important then anyway.” He slumped back into his chair. “Twelve year olds make everything so dramatic.”
Declaration
The office was quiet save for a soft murmur of voices trickling past the half-open door to his private chamber. Bored, Colonel Mustang tuned an ear to the muffled conversation and was able to pick out, first, Warrant Officer Vato Falman—
“In October of 1661, the citizens of Cameron staged an armed protest when the military refused to pay the local men hired to work on the construction of the new bridge. This was despite their earlier promises of good pay.”
—and then, the office’s new regular, Edward Elric.
“So, they weren’t happy with doing all the work and not having anything to show for it.”
“Correct,” said Falman.
History lessons, Mustang mused. He wondered if Fullmetal was simply bored with the report he should be writing or considering some lead in Cameron. Either way, he was probably quickly learning that asking a question of Falman was guaranteed to get you more of an answer than you bargained for. The normally laconic warrant officer had a memory like an encyclopedia and a tendency to recite the full “entry” on any given topic when prompted. It was a useful talent but one that could quickly wear at the nerves.
“Hey, has anyone ever revolted just because they thought the Fuhrer was a jerk?”
Fullmetal was definitely bored. Well, that report had better be completed by day’s end or it would be some time before he found anymore opportunities for boredom.
“Yes, in fact,” Falman was saying. “In 1594...”
Mustang tuned the remainder of the conversation out.
----------------------------------
“What,” Mustang felt taut muscles cause an involuntary tick over his right eye, “is this?”
In his hands was Fullmetal’s report. If it could be called that.
“Whereas my commanding officer has chosen to shirk his duties and instead assign a subordinate to handle all affairs he deems tasteless or in some way beneath his standing and whereas said subordinate is a duly recognized State Alchemist pursuing an important line of research, I, as the aforementioned State Alchemist, do hereby declare my refusal to perform further menial tasks unless provided just compensation.”
And, that was just the opening paragraph. The “report” continued with a detailed list of grievances, references to military law, comparisons to historical conflicts and obvious abuse of a thesaurus. The actual report on Fullmetal’s most recent mission was a small footnote.
“Oh, for—!” Mustang slammed the report down on the desk. “I asked him to pick up my uniform from the laundry once!”
“The uniform and a sandwich, Sir,” Hawkeye corrected.
“One uniform, one sandwich, one time,” said Mustang. “And, he wasn’t doing anything important then anyway.” He slumped back into his chair. “Twelve year olds make everything so dramatic.”
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no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 06:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 03:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 10:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 03:52 pm (UTC)Mustang: Forget the yelling, why is there a boot print in my sandwich?
no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 01:43 pm (UTC)*busts out laughing*
This is great! :)
no subject
Date: 2010-09-15 07:09 pm (UTC)I was stumped on Falman for ages, and then this came along. Poor guy. The one time I write about him, he just gets to be Ed's talking encyclopedia.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-16 01:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-09-17 02:48 am (UTC)